Sisters, and second chances

Me and my sisters (miss you Julie)

Last year, when my sister Jeannie came in town, we had a heart to heart sister talk. Not unusual for us; we have always had a deep close relationship. I confided in her that I had always felt sad at Christmas time, all my life from my earliest memory of the holiday. Sure, every year I shopped, baked, decorated, smiled, sang and laughed with my family, however, there was a deep rooted feeling of sadness in my heart. We looked back together over the holiday memories when we were growing up. We unleashed painful memories of a poor family, a mentally ill father who was often at his worst during Christmas, of
a mother who tried to build traditions,give gifts on a meager budget, of cold nights without heat and long days without transportation. She allowed the raw pain and bitterness to be expressed without guilt, without judging. She told me to imagine the Christmas I would have wanted to be given, and create it for myself, for my children and family. I let go of all the pain, all the guilt, all the bitterness that year and started over; for myself, for my family, for all who have ever lived with the hardship that having a family member with severe mental illness have endured. I let Christ come and pour His light into my life. So this Christmas season is monumental for me; I am free for the first time and truly happy this season. I am praying for those who are lonely, sick or in any pain. I know the liberation healing the soul can bring and now I am praying for this healing to reach out to others...

My sisters and I have always been close, interwoven into each others lives, drawing strength from each other. I am not surprised that a sister was able to open my heart to Christmas. It is never too late to heal, it is never to late to start over, maybe that is what the birth of Jesus has shown me....second chances

So here we are on Christmas Eve at T Bonz, feasting, laughing and enjoying life after church. Here is my new life with Bruce and our beautiful children. I am thankful, so thankful...

Enjoy the holiday

Joanne

Finding joy in the journey......

Do you ever think about the journey? the journey of life, the journey of a family raising children? I do, alot. I think about this journey that Bruce & I are on raising our 3 together, with all the laundry, the food and driving. I think about how to make sure every single day to find joy in this journey. I am not talking about anything expensive, or complicated. I am referring to simple joy, small things that we experience with the children that jump out at me when least expected and bring that warm joy.

Here are a few of my joyful moments recently:

I love love love to read aloud to children, any children. Michael still will ask for me to do this and I read chapter books with him most nights. One night recently after we read, we started talking. He took me on a journey through his school day. He asked me to take him through my day. After we talked/listened to each other he said he wanted to know if we could talk like this again tomorrow night. So begins the pillow talks.....

Morgan was working a couple of weekends ago. She was feeling a little under the weather. She called me from work and told me she felt terrible. I decided to go get her so she wouldn't have to drive home feeling so poorly. I made her hot tea with honey and picked her up. She got in the car, letting me know that she was able to drive herself home, sipped on the tea, then silence. I glanced over and she had taken the blanket I had packed and curled up, she was sound asleep and stayed that way the entire way home. Everyone needs to be taken care of, to be pampered when they are sick. Sometimes as we all get a little older, the only time we will accept caregiving is in the face of an illness.

Joy...Matthew decided to sand down his old guitar and repaint it. He sanded for weeks, bought the paint and did a beautiful job painting it. That is until all the paint began peeling off. He forgot to prime it. So...back to lowes, days of sanding, days of priming, painting, applying paint tape, and finally the masterpiece. He had worked hard. Twice. It turned out wonderfully. He took it to the guitar center to get a pic guard, one of the employees made his day. He told Matt that if he continued to customize guitars, he would be very successful one day.

Joy, simple small things bring so much joy along our journey. Usually the ordinary days, doing ordinary tasks bring about the unexpected feelings of warmth and joy in our lives.

Sundays...

The Citadel Chapel

putting the tree up......

Sundays in the cold weather are about church, napping, reading, hobbies....It has been really cold for Charleston. We have been indoors more than any of us are used to. Matt sanded down an old guitar and painted it, Michael is practicing piano more often, Morgan baked cookies and decorated them last week. I have been reading and watching Christmas movies with the kids. Maybe, just maybe there is a good side to this weather; it forces connectiveness by keeping us together, inside, and gives us time to reflect & slow down a little. We picked out a tree together, strapped it onto the top of the car and decorated it all together in the warmth of the den. Then we started our holiday season according to our tradition: we attended the candle light ceremony at The Citadel in the chapel. It is completely packed, mystical, and I highly recommend going. The cadet choir and band provide beautiful music and scripture readings. The pictures do not capture the event well at all. I love to sit in the chapel and close my eyes while the cadet choir signs and just take it all in. This year, however, Morgan and Nana could not come. Morgan was sick, and Nana fell at my house over Thanksgiving. So it was not the same. Enjoy the start of the holidays, relax, reflect and don't worry over shopping or the minor details of the season. Isn't it better to accomplish less, but to enjoy what you do accomplish??

Holiday blessings

puppy love....

In my journey to simply blessings, I cannot forget how much joy DOGS (God spelled backwards, as Michael reminds me) bring. I have always laughingly said that raising boys is similar to having puppies: I believe that more than ever with the lab puppy. It has come naturally to me

having a puppy, because it really is like raising boys. Love + play + run + food + sleep = a good day. I have never had a lab before, but they are wonderful energetic pets. If you can put up with the chewing, and if your house can survive it, it is worth it. I love seeing the kids enjoying a pet and learning how to care for them. So today I am thankful for pets, tomorrow if I find another chewed up shoe, I may not be so thankful.....

Joanne

Simplicity in a complicated world

The perfect view from a house around the corner
and here we are trespassing in our PJ's with not a care in the world!!!

Matthew customized his old guitar

Michael has learned how to kyack

yard...

the girls with the new diva blanket

Li swinging

and poor Mom with the fractured arm!!!!

But what I am really thinking about tonight, and so many many of my days, is that I love love to live simply. I strive to live simply everyday, however, technology often wins out.I find great peace in simplicity and I know that children do as well. Li and all the children that come head straight for the homemade rope swing and do not take any notice of the wood and plastic swing set in the yard. There is something about a rope swing daggling from an oak tree that just beckons you to enjoy. So I am making a concerted effort to blog about the small simple things that I enjoy.

Matthew caught the first and only fish from our little creek last weekend. I was just getting ready to get in the shower, when I glanced outside and saw him reeling in a fish. I screamed like a crazy person and ran out in my PJ's to get a glimpse at it. I was so excited. Then came the kyack trip. Michael & Bruce took Jerry with Li then Kevin from the back yard to the harbor. Michael has gained enough confidence to go in his own kyack. It is so beautiful out there. And my last simple blessing came when me, Micheal, Jeannie and Jerry got into the golf cart around 7 or 8-pm and drove over to a house that is being built around the corner. I wanted them to experience the amazing view from the yard. we grabbed blankets and crept around to the back of the house and sat star gazing. Jerry took the pictures and captured it so well with the bridge against the dark sky.....

Simply

Joanne

Giving Thanks

Left is all the kids on the joggling board, they loved playing on that!

Flag football.....(above) our neighbor let them play basketball and football in THEIR yard!!

I woke up so excited on Thanksgiving day. We were having our FIRST big holiday in our new home and I was thrilled to be hosting. I don't have a formal dining room, we are not formal people anyway, however I did have to put some thought into fitting 24 people in to eat......

Well, I opened up the french doors(below) and put a table on the patio and it was amazing. It felt like we were bringing the outside in and the inside out!! I rushed and got a camera to take a picture b/c I was so hapy. Then I put a table in the great room a (left) and we were all comfy.... Praying, Eating, cooking, playing basketball, football, swinging, fishing, running, climbing trees, all of the simple things that kids love to do- all of this was going on all day long. Lots of dirty hands and feet, pluff mud tracked in, dogs running loose, the things that make a house a home, happened to my home on Thursday. Bruce and I sat back and watched and talked about how this has been our dream for so long. We love having an OLD home, it has weathered children, storms, many holidays. We love having a creek and old oaks for the children to play in and climb and fish.... Thank you to everyone who came, who cooked, who smiled and hugged, for the love and the laughter.

The house was full, our stomaches were full, and most importantly, our hearts were full....

Blessings,

Joanne

k
Michelle, my niece came over to help decorate on a dime. She went in the yard and we found the gorgeous Savannah holly with the red berries, camelias which were arranged in vases and some palms. It came out gorgeous with tealight candles and the beautiful sunny weather. God really sent the perfect weather, sunny, breezy and in the mid seventies.... after eating the kids played outside for hours.

Family.....

In the span of 5 days so many Thanksgiving blessings were showered on me and my family, it will take days of posting to do it justice. I hope anyone reading this has had a wonderful weekend and that anyone reading this will remember what a blessing family truly is. I spent some time praying for those who were alone or lonely during the weekend. I am still trying my best to pray more often and seek out simple blessings.
So I must start with my

family that I grew up with.

Jeannie and her family come every year and spend the holiday with us. Cathy and family either travel to Chas or offer to host, of course mom is here and still looking great, Chris and Dell(who is just like another sister) either come or host. We all miss our sister Julie at this time. She loved all holidays and was so much fun. I am going to brag- my family has this down to a science. Really, we all know what to bring every year, we laugh, eat, have the kids all running around, drink wine and take hundreds of pictures. It is my FAVORITE holiday because we are ALL together with ALL the kids!!! Losing our sister/friend, Julie, taught me to never ever take one another for granted. It taught me to relax about the small stuff and concentrate on relationships.

Happily,

Joanne

Fall, well not really we ARE in the south you know...

I have enjoyed the "fall" even though obviously it is warm. No jackets needed here. The seawall is almost complete and we should have the yard back for Thanksgiving. Me and my sister in law took the kids to the fair. Michael got to bring a school friend for the first time; he is the one in the picture that is sound asleep with his turkey leg on the seat beside him. He is a wonderful little boy who had never been to the fair, and I feel sure he usually goes to bed early.... Now it is time to get ready for the holiday madness. I am sooo looking forward to having all my family in town and a full house.